Yun Yi: “Being an official is 996; being Emperor is 007.”
Officials are the Emperor’s workhorses, and the Emperor is the workhorse of all the people under heaven—far less free than a carefree crane in the clouds.
Yun Yi had attended the morning court with Xiao Zhi before—it truly meant rising before the stars, while the sun was still lazing in bed.
She glanced at Xiao Zhi, dazed and muddled: “Good thing there are no consorts in your harem. A workaholic like you—even if you were lying in a consort’s gentle embrace, you’d probably leave her behind and get up to attend court, wouldn’t you?”
Yu Lian’er, still unmarried, blushed—the things their young lady said were just too crude.
Xiao Zhi tapped the cricket lightly against her forehead three times: “That’s your punishment.”
But she remained dazed and unfazed by the punishment.
Truly drunk.
Xiao Zhi crouched down, signaling Yu Lian’er to help the girl onto his back. He tilted his head, his peripheral vision catching her flushed face: “Let’s go back.”
Her lips suddenly pressed close, brushing past Xiao Zhi’s earlobe, carrying the sweet fragrance of Qionghua wine.
Yun Yi exhaled slowly: “In a society ruled by law, hitting people is illegal.”
“…” Forget it—what good words could come from a drunkard?
“I want to go home.” Yun Yi hooked her finger around his hair ribbon, twisting and rubbing it like a toy she found pleasing to handle.
“Alright, I’ll take you back to the residence.”
“Back to the residence” meant back to the palace.
But the “home” in Yun Yi’s mouth meant her real home.
Above them hung only two or three stars; the moon had hidden behind a veil of clouds, exuding the desolation of a lone star and a waning moon.
He trod through the night dew. A drunk person was quite heavy—he hoisted her up by the bend of her knees.
.
Helian Tu had injured someone for no reason.
That woman had been ennobled by the Emperor as County Princess Kanghua.
That was one more crime on top of the others.
Combined punishments: three hundred strokes of the cane.
In consideration of Helian Tu’s special status, a leniency was granted—the punishment was divided into three sessions, one hundred strokes each day, over three consecutive days.
Helian Tu’s eyes were clouded with a bloody haze, his voice hoarse and desperate: “Xiao, you might as well just give me a clean death!”
The news reached the Kingdom of Kangju.
The Kangju Khan flew into a rage and immediately dispatched additional troops to the border.
A show of force—and a show of resolve.
.
Beneath the statues of the Three Pure Ones knelt a Daoist priest.
“This humble priest pays respects to Your Majesty.”
“About the Heavenly Revelation Star Chart you mentioned before.”
The Celestial Master hadn’t expected the Emperor to suddenly ask about this.
He vaguely recalled that night when an anomalous star had appeared, streaking past the Ziwei constellation—and then a person had suddenly appeared in the Emperor’s arms.
He was absolutely certain he hadn’t mistaken it.
“Your Majesty, the next appearance of that anomalous star will be a thousand years from now,” the Celestial Master said, sweat beading on his back, terrified that the Emperor might ask him to concoct an elixir of immortality—he was just an insignificant, inept Daoist!
“I’m not waiting for that star.” The Emperor’s words relieved the Celestial Master somewhat. “I ask you to set up an altar and perform rites to make that star appear a thousand years later—one day, one moment, not a second off.”
“Your—” The Celestial Master’s face fell.
He couldn’t handle this task!
The anomalous star had once appeared over Yan, and at that time, a person had appeared in the Emperor’s arms.
If they could make the star go to a thousand years later, influencing the present from the future, then the person who remained in Yan at this moment might be able to travel through time and successfully return to a thousand years later.
Wow, how brilliant—instead of ruling the country, the Emperor ought to write supernatural tales.
The Celestial Master lit three sticks of incense and handed them to the Emperor.
That noble, refined face appeared even more devout amid the ethereal smoke.
He walked to the meditation cushion and calmly looked up. The Three Pure Ones gazed down with kind eyes and brows, slightly bowed as if receiving the incense offerings of the mortal world.
The Emperor carried no scent of ambergris—only a sweet, fruity fragrance, like a woman’s scented balm.
He knelt on the cushion: “Venerable Daoist Lords above, this disciple Xiao Zhi earnestly begs for your divine manifestation…”
The Celestial Master was stunned—the Emperor had actually knelt!
.
When Yun Yi woke up, the alcohol had somewhat faded.
Asking the palace attendants, she learned that the Emperor had been handling state affairs through the night and had now gone to morning court.
All morning, she didn’t see the Emperor—but she did see the princess.
Xiao Qingzhu wore an apricot-yellow ruqun, not as long and cumbersome as her princess robes. The translucent snow-silk revealed a hint of her delicate shoulders—carrying both a woman’s grace and a young girl’s natural charm.
“This princess fell asleep in the carriage and woke up already back at the palace. Where did you two go?”
Yun Yi leaned against the edge of the fish tank, watching the fish: “Spent the night at Imperial Physician Zhou’s residence. Woke up, went shopping, had some drinks…” and got drunk.
“Fine!” Xiao Qingzhu was indignant.
While she was away, the two of them had gone shopping and drinking.
“Second Brother won’t let me drink, but he took you drinking! He’s playing favorites!”
A ranchu goldfish surfaced, blowing a string of bubbles.
Yun Yi fed it some dried earthworms, and the fish clumsily fought for the food.
“Shall this servant take the princess for a drink, then?”
“Another time.” The princess feared Xiao Zhi above all. “Then take me for a walk around the palace? Second Brother won’t show me around—you have to make it up to me.”
“…” She’d only heard of children paying their father’s debts—what was her relationship with Xiao Zhi? He neglected his sister—why did she have to entertain her?
The princess sat erect on her palanquin, every inch dignified.
“Hey, come sit up here!” the princess called out.
Yun Yi kept her eyes fixed ahead: “Princess, this servant riding on the same palanquin as you—it’s not proper.”
It wasn’t proper—in the palace, her identity was merely that of an insignificant little eunuch.
“So boring.” The princess listened.
Yun Yi cast her a glance. A noble princess, living deep in the palace—her only companion was endless loneliness.
Though the marriage alliance crisis had been averted for now, the Emperor would eventually have to find a husband for his sister.
And then she would simply move from the deep palace to a princess’s manor.
“Shall this servant play a word-chain game with the princess, then?”
“Hiss…” The princess stuck out her tongue—the word “dragon” was taboo in the palace.
No one was around.
From the cracks between the palace bricks, clover peeked out, a patch of green dotted with tiny pink flowers.
Yun Yi stepped aside, not wanting to trample this wild charm.
She started with the princess’s name: “Qingzhu—the bamboo that can’t be written away.”
“Write, write…” Xiao Qingzhu kept signaling her senior maidservant, who looked both panicked and bewildered.
A flash of inspiration struck Xiao Qingzhu: “Writing, chess, music, painting.”
That wasn’t how the game worked, but fine—Yun Yi indulged her: “Painting the dragon, dotting the eyes.”
“!” That was a capital offense—painting a fake dragon and then wanting to dot its eyes?
The princess took a deep breath—the more forbidden, the more thrilling!
“The finishing touch.”
Yun Yi continued: “The brush moves like a dragon and snake.”
The princess’s head tilted out from the palanquin, her expression lively and youthful. She reached out and chopped the “little eunuch” on the side of the neck: “Keep it down—that’s a beheading offense.”
—”Who does the princess wish to behead?” A dignified, steady voice.
Xiao Qingzhu’s hand froze midair. The palanquin trembled slightly, and her line of sight dropped instantly.
The palanquin bearers knelt on both sides of the palace path, and the maidservants had long since prostrated themselves.
Yun Yi recognized the Taoist temple diagonally ahead—wasn’t that the very one where that stinky Emperor had thrown her into a side room to sleep on a hard bed?
The bright yellow figure ahead shone like molten gold. Yun Yi hastily knelt properly along with the other palace attendants.
Xiao Qingzhu: “Your sister pays respects to Your Majesty.”
The Emperor’s eyes swept around for a moment before settling on the little eunuch beside the palanquin.
“Hmph.” Xiao Qingzhu thought to herself. So she was the spare one.
“What were you playing?” Xiao Zhi walked over to Yun Yi.
“This servant answers Your Majesty—playing a word-chain game with the princess…” Yun Yi remembered what the princess had said about beheading, swallowed the word “dragon,” and clamped her mouth shut.
Xiao Zhi saw her sticking her rear up, sprawled on the ground with her arms spread wide like a clawing beast. After living in the palace for some time, she hadn’t learned much else, but her kneeling posture was growing increasingly insolent.
Though a small eunuch, her nerve was considerable.
He threatened: “You won’t tell me? The Punishment Bureau—”
Yun Yi: “A word-chain game!” She said it loud, afraid the Emperor wouldn’t hear. The startled sparrows scattered in all directions.
Silence reigned for a long while.
Her fingers were going numb from supporting her. She muttered: “You’re the one who insisted on asking.”
That pair of casual boots embroidered with dragon heads passed before her eyes, followed by a very soft voice: “Idiot. Get up and follow.”
The Emperor’s voice rang out again: “You insolent little eunuch! Come with me to the Punishment Bureau to receive your punishment.”
The kneeling attendants were all terrified.
These attendants had only recently entered the palace—none of them knew Little Chair was a woman. They only thought “he” was unlucky to have been caught by the Emperor after serving the princess for just one hour.
Who told Little Chair to speak carelessly? Offending the imperial dragon’s temper—wasn’t that just asking for it?
Xiao Qingzhu gathered her ruqun and chased after them: “You’re not taking me with you?”
Xiao Zhi glanced at her: “Failing to discipline your servants—I punish you by ordering you back to your palace to reflect.”
“You—you both…” Xiao Qingzhu stomped her feet in frustration.
Yun Yi looked at her and shrugged.
“Still not coming with me?” Xiao Zhi was displeased. “Add another fifty strokes of the cane.”
Yun Yi’s ears were calloused from his act. She played along: “This servant thanks His Majesty for the reward—long live the Emperor, ten thousand years, ten thousand ten thousand years.”
Xiao Zhi: “…”
The Taoist temple.
The Celestial Master and Yun Yi caught each other’s eye.
Most young eunuchs in the palace looked like sprouted bean sprouts.
But this one had red lips and white teeth, slightly puffed cheeks—clearly a little master who ate, drank, and slept well.
And her fingers—as tender and fine as scallion whites—had never done rough work.
Though the Celestial Master had little real ability, his eye was uniquely sharp. On the night the anomalous star appeared, the one the Emperor had held in his arms was most likely this very person.
The Emperor led Yun Yi to kneel on the meditation cushion: “Quick, kowtow to the Three Pure Ones.”
Dissatisfied with her un-pious posture, he said: “Move over.”
So the Emperor was superstitious too—he also wanted to worship. Yun Yi moved the adjacent cushion over, dusted it off, and gestured for the Emperor to kneel on that one.
But instead of kneeling on the large cushion, the Emperor squeezed onto the one at her feet.
A small cushion, holding two pairs of knees—cramped and tight, at first glance like a joined branch growing from the ground.
The Celestial Master lit the incense and handed it to the Emperor—but unexpectedly, the Emperor passed the three sticks to the little eunuch.
The Celestial Master’s thoughts wandered, nearly forgetting his role and profession—this scene looked exactly like a young couple bowing before the heavens.
“Quick, kowtow to the Three Pure Ones,” the Emperor urged.
Pressed against the Emperor, Yun Yi almost tipped sideways to the ground, but he held her waist, forcing her even closer to his side.
Smoke swirled around them.
“May this devotee pray that Xiao Zhi’s wishes be fulfilled; may Yan enjoy peace and prosperity, secure borders, and the people live in contentment.”
She finished her pious bow and turned back—only to see Xiao Zhi’s jaw tightly clenched. What was wrong with him?
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the Emperor’s wide sleeve overlapping with her scattered eunuch’s robe.
In the place she couldn’t see, the large hand hidden in that sleeve was tightly clutching the hem of her clothes—as if letting go would make her vanish into thin air.
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